Posts by Granny Linda

Absolutely! I have healed. It took time, but was worth all the effort. It comes down to self responsibility - how we choose to live our life today without the backlash of JWism controlling our thinking.

The willingness to continue prodding through all the mental and emotional garbarge heaped upon most of us does just one day vanish. My experience was all of a sudden it dawned on me that I was no longer being controlled by old thinking. The old stinkin' thinkin' that can keep our mind enslaved.

I'm a firm believer in recovery. It's possible, but we must do the necessary work. And what worked for me might not work for another. The point being...finding your own comfort zone..stop comparing ourselves to others in how recovery is going to work. When we work it, it works for us.

Celebrate LIFE.

granny; of the "glad I hung in there" class. The rewards are too numerous to mention.

21

It's Snowing In Dallas!

by COMF in

jw
friends

...which is about as rare as hen's teeth.

and it's sticking (at least, at the moment... 11:30 am)!

i hope it keeps up all day and into the night.

Granny Linda

Wow! Too cool. I love the snow. It snowed in this valley, which is not uncommon, but less likely then up north, two days before Christmas. It was absolutely beautiful. It did stick overnight but the sun came and melted it rather quickly the next morning.

We have been experiencing drought conditions for a couple years now, so any moisture is a welcome sight. Getting ready to move into Colorado where hopefully we will see more of the white stuff during winter months. We are told the town we are relocating to sits in a valley surrounded by mountains that are snowed covered most of the year. I'm excited.

You enjoy this welcome change of pace. Maybe there will be enough snow on the ground to make a snowman, or maybe even have a snowball fight.

granny, who remembers and relishes in the memory of SNOW from her long ago childhood.

24

Friction between us

by JH in

jw
friends

how do you react when a person makes fun of your posts on this site?

maybe it never happened to you, but for those that this happened, how do you react when a person seems to be doing on purpose to put you down for what you said or just say the opposite of what you're saying?

do you forgive, or do you hate a few people on this site?

Granny Linda

Here, too, I've read posts over this past year and half that would make a sailor blush. It was somewhat shocking at first, but I've come to appreciate moreso the "diversity" among those of us who share that common bond of JWism.

Generally I'm more disgusted with those who label so easily with the "racist" nonsense just because there is a difference of opinion. So for the most part I stay away from those 'flame wars.' It just isn't fun being stoned and burned at the stake over opinions - knowing neither side will change.

Besides, I still hold that this is a board for recovery...not more of the same Shame attacks we grew up with in that sickening religion. Today I'd rather maintain a more positive outlook towards others...even when I disagree. But, yeah, the name calling at times is pretty ridiculous for so called mature adults. AH...I'm busted. I do refer to JW's as anything but human at times. Oh well.

Live and let live.

granny linda

28

Ah maght be unejuamakaitud

by Marcos in

jw
friends

i just read a reply on another thread (doesnt really matter which one) in which a person made reference to 2 elders and said that they were not too bright, perhaps inbreeding.

presumably this was said because the guys acted in a stupid manner in their counseling and were from the american south.

are southerners really stupid and inbred?

Granny Linda

As Forrest Gump's mama might say, "Stupid is as stupid does", or some such thing.

My two year experience in Alabama was learning how civil rights and civil war where daily topics among most. If not for, "come to my church and be happy." Yuck. No thank you.

I'll stay west, and ya'll can stay happy and content where you are, too. Isn't it great having choices.

Well what ya gonna say about most JW's, period, eh. This thing about more diversity is a bullcrap because we have more then enough "diversity" within our own boundaries...as you pointed out.

granny, who hates humidity and the bugs that accompany such.

cheers

7

Are we obligated to JW family?

by Granny Linda in

jw
friends

while reading through and posting in unbeliever's thread, this topic came to mind.

personally i do not have any sense of obligation to jw family that still holds to such dogma.

that means it doesn't matter to me that my mother ignores her grandson; and her great-grandchildren.

Granny Linda

While reading through and posting in unbeliever's thread, this topic came to mind.

Personally I do not have any sense of obligation to JW family that still holds to such dogma. That means it doesn't matter to me that my mother ignores her grandson; and her great-grandchildren. And they were never JW. My son who now has a family of his own certainly has no obligation to such people, either. Yet we understand the importance of family. So the real loser's in life are those who refuse to set their religion aside - yet think they are deserving of our devotion. So what's your thinking on this?

granny

11

questions for those shunned

by unbeliever in

jw
friends

my mom totally shuns my sister.

she has for the last 10+ years.

even though my mom treats my sister like she is dead she has always been given access to the grandkids.

Granny Linda

I really do hate reading stories of shunning....it's such a cruel, cruel thing.

Some good input here. It's always interesting how different people approach this issue with their families. Unlike JWs who seem to suffer not from such behavior because they are soooo special (gag/puke), they really do think they have a right to impose their mental illness upon other family members.

I say be done with them! Why should our loved one's be subjected to "grandma" our "uncle", or whomever, just because they think they have a right???? I've no patience for "family" like that. Too many years in overcoming my own shit to allow such vileness close to my loved ones. You wanna see your grandchilren????? Then by golly you will respect OUR guidlines...or be gone.

Let me tell you something since it seems I'm in a talkative mood: These self-righteous, distorter's of truth, those family members in particular, can kiss my arse! Do you really see any thing postive coming out of allowing such influence upon young minds? I don't.

Normally I'm not so, let's say hostile about this in my life because I've dealt with being df for over 30 years. But I certainly do care about what we allow our children to be around. And that above all else means JW family members.

I wish you well on this journey. Learning healthy detachment versus shunning, is a reward of introspection. No one should ever tell you it's easy, but the end result is one of inner peace and self acceptance. These are fine qualities to take with one throughout life.

If you are not familiar with John Bradshaw, I do recommend his lectures/books. He explains in terms I could identify with, this thing called religious abuse. He deals with a variety of family dysfunctions, and I'd say right off one big message is that of SHAME. The individual must come to reconize what that is, how and why it's used. Humans are not really obligated to family; despite what some might want us to believe. Or so is my opinion. That might be a good thread to start...how are we obligated, if at all, to family? especially those like you just described...Hummm

Anyhow, my recovering years have brought rewards I'd never thought possible. Stay strong for sake of what is common decency. Beware of your association with such family members because they are of a mind set that is self destructive; and they don't want to go it alone.

Let the dead, bury their dead.

granny

12

JWs Uneducated (Unejamakatud?)

by Marcos in

jw
friends

my formal education ended with high school.

i did a couple of semesters of college work but it really doesnt count.

i believe that almost any kind of legal employment is honorable depending on how we approach it.

Granny Linda

Remove the whole JW thing and many of us would have done things differently. Like yourself, my life has been full of adventure and amazement. THe thing about "education" does not carry the impact upon my thinking as it did when I was younger. Learning how to develope common sense, and how to become our own decision maker (knowing what's best for us), is something pretty valuable, too. Then again it's been said common sense is not something you learn, but born with.

Actually to my way of thinking it's about being around people who have overcome obsticles, period. And remember big daddy Henry Ford had something like a 3rd or 4th grade education. The really smart person, in my opinion, is one who lives their life according to their likes/dislikes. And not by the dictates of other's. Perhaps when we stop comparing ourselves with a sick society of liars and hyprocrites, we can begin seeing just how damn smart we really are.

Love ya's....granny

6

About living life

by whyhideit in

jw
friends

it seems like it was only yesterday, yet i know it was much further back in time.

i was but a child then and only about four or five.

my mom was taking my sister and me to the hospital to see our grandmother.

Granny Linda

Yes, indeed. I learned long time ago that the only thing we take with us, is the love we leave behind.

Check this out. Given to me (grandma) and my husband (grandpa) for Christmas, from my son and his wife.

"One hundred years from now it will not matter, what kind of house we lived in, how much money we had, Nor what my clothes were like.

But the world may be a little better, because I was important in the life of a child."

Making memories...that's what my friend would alway say.

Granny

3

Life apart from JW's.

by Granny Linda in

jw
friends

not sure where all this rambling i'm going to do will end up, but i'm sure there will be words reminding myself how grateful i am for recovery from religious abuse.

some may remember i orginally came aboard sites such as this doing research for a fence-riding jw sibling.

after years of no contact we were able to begin anew.

Granny Linda

Not sure where all this rambling I'm going to do will end up, but I'm sure there will be words reminding myself how grateful I am for recovery from religious abuse.

Some may remember I orginally came aboard sites such as this doing research for a fence-riding JW sibling. After years of no contact we were able to begin anew. Which was a good thing because we had always been so close. Anyhow, last summer when this sister wrote an e-mail full of confusion and what sounded like depression to me, I wrote back stating in no uncertain terms my thoughts about that religion today. And of course that was the end of any further association...until yesterday.

Although we live miles apart when my sister and her husband went to visit his daughter, they would also go to the same chiropracter as we do. And that doctor just happens to be a childhood friend of my husband. This whole scenerio is so funny at times...sorry guys, when I do write, I'm longwinded.

"Doc" mentioned how my brother-in-law was going to have open heart surgery. Yesterday when my sister went to see Doc, he told her that I was moving out of state at month's end and she might call and let me know her husband died last Friday. So when she called asking to stop by on her way home, it was great hearing her voice.

During that visit I made comment about how good it would be if we sister's could get together again. This move will put me within 20 miles of the youngest one who refuses me at each turn. This ridiculous situation started at least 12 years ago, and my twice attempts at amends have been denied. Guess there was that moment of relapse - I forget my status...Disfellowshipped

OMG! Writing this has made me start chuckling. Humor through paradox helps my sanity.

What I have accepted as a self-truth is knowing this move encompasses many pending changes that are all positive. And if that includes seeing my younger sibling, so be it. I like how my surrogate mother expressed it. Today I have No Fear. Hummmm. That's cool.

Nearly 16 years ago at my worst mentally, physically, spritually, this family accepted me wholeheartedly. and have witnessed the transformation. So when 'mom' mentioned having no fear, I could reconize that aspect of change. Damn, that felt good.

Too many years spent in bondage to the mindset of not only JW's, but anyone lurking about just waiting to take advantage of innocence. It comes with life. And I do believe these sickening religious do-gooder's might be better served trying to learn how it is many like myself - make them seem like piker's in the game of LOVE. Screw em.

It's funny as hell - I'll still hit the bong at times, and my dear, sweet sister that just lost her husband, can stay on Prozac for another 12 years. LIFE. What a wonderfully grand adventure in getting to know ourself. It's pretty damn special if ya ask me.

And guess what? My life is soooooo ok with out those people that being disfellowshipped in their eyes doesn't mean diddly squat shit to me this day. We in this home practice the Magik of Love. Nothing more then what they would preach at us. Only difference is, our kind of love sure as heck is nicer then their interpetation. Or perhaps I've just made my life better by finding out what the hell makes me, as Jack Nicholson said in that one movie..., "It makes me feel good about me."

So for any of you newbies and/or lurkers...I have a testiomony to offer the world. It's how I live my life. And who else is suppose to be responsible? Them? I think NOT today.

Thanks guys for being here for this old lady. Geezzzz. At least I'm still smiling

granny, from the "Keep's Learning Klass."